Friends are Forever Nov 17, 2009

Well things just keep getting so much better. I just heard from Brooke one of Rachel's friends from high school that became my friend years ago I was so happy to hear her voice. She's coming over tomorrow for lunch. Earlier Marc told me that David Aunt Erm's son just got married he is a surprise wrapped an enigma. Nikki left a message that Jack really likes the tea I made. I think I am going to have a new little hobby by making tea bags specifically for different ailments. Headaches, sinus problems, relaxation etc. So the abilify is working and my positive attitude makes more positive attitude. I don't mind no one reads this blog cause I know where it is and I print it out and glue it my journal so I remember things that happen.

Nikki paid her phone bill she is so sweet at least I don't have to bother her constantly. I hate to have to bother people. Catt also did her share. I'll need her before the end of the month but maybe not I hope not. Her son was in the hospital Byron and Brandon has to wear the anklet two more months. But Brian Jr is doing ok I guess. He's graduated high school and I don't think he has a job, but he's such a good boy.

This Facebook stuff is also kind of neat. People I haven't heard from in forever suddenly back in my life it's so kewl. I don't think I'll make it to NC for Thanksgiving my stye is still pretty active and I've been exhausted. I'll call mitchell later and talk to him about the whole thing.

Yesterday went with Catt to the hospital and then we met Ryan at the turning wheel and he bought me all sorts of really great stuff. Life is so wonderful.

Namaste JoDee

Friends are always there for you if you just ask

I had been feeling a little pity party for myself recently Money Troubles, Family Troubles, Health you get the idea. I'm always there for everyone else, I thought to myself. No one ever does for me. Well I was wrong. You can crawl into a shell where no one will see you and then you don't get any help at all. Or you can in conversation in a non whiney way say something like, "Hey you know I'm kind a short this month and it would really be great if you could ________________.
I prayed on this and did a pagan money spell along with throwing some Tarot. That first one was horrible it showed all sorts of ways I block others from helping. So I started asking, and low and behold my friends appeared. My close friends, my pagan friends, my family, some of these people I've known for years but just on the Internet and they all responded with whatever they could do.

My spirit was so uplifted to know that the Goddess has been there watching over me and not letting me get to a bad place. The only area of negativity was my ex husband I guess he's not happy that he has to pay the exorbitant premium on my health care. I don't think when he made the deal that he would be paying this long on my health insurance. But he was cold in his email, I guess that's the only way he can deal with difficult things in his life. He has his daughter in knots about not talking about him to me, I feel so sad for her. Especially after the whole Poppy funeral debacle.

Rachel was afraid to talk to me cause her dad asked her to let him tell me that poppy passed away only he didn't seem to quite get around to it. I finally left a voice message to my kid saying I was going to start calling family and friends and even the police that's how worried I was for her especially her father. A little while later the phone rang and it was my ex and he explained that dad had died and he asked our kid not to say anything but obviously she felt she couldn't talk to me cause I was instantly know something was wrong. She was afraid I'd be angry. I told her, "I'm the one who says I'm so sorry for your loss" never be afraid to tell me anything I only want the best for you. You listened to your dad and showed him the respect he needed and I was not angry or upset with her at all. My angel shouldering all that when the ex could have just called told me of the death and that I wasn't welcome at the funeral.

He didn't need a reason it was his dad, I was upset that he waited almost 2 weeks after the funeral to call and then only because I threatened to get extreme if I didn't hear from my child.. I did write a long what I thought was beautiful letter to my ex mother in law about what a great person Dad Was. I never heard back anything so I let it go to god. Anyway back to the FRIENDS

So many doing so many different things for me, I could just cry with joy I can't believe I never asked for help before. You are all such beautiful souls. I will not let people who are negative get at me. I'm better than that. To all my friends.

Namaste,
Ita Keyley
JoDee

up and atem

haven't been writing much. just got out of a hot bed had the heater on to cold bathroom. Visited Evie and Doda and Heather today. I ended up falling asleep and Evie took care of me it was such a wonderful comfortating feeling they are all such beautiful people so caring and I believe sent by goddess to help me get through the rough times.

Their house is awesome and beautiful and well maintained I felt so comfortable there. We hung out had pizza, it was bliss. And they have the cutest little doggies that really helped make me feel extra comfortable.

Still havent' gotten together with Nikki but I will today and i'll check up on Catt about what time she needs to be at the doctors on Monday.

Feeling much Better

So Next months bill on phone is going to better than this month which was 360 this month I wonder I hopedamn it.................. talk to ya tomorrow

Pain and Bliss

It's a wierd freakin day. The dental company turned down my application for financial help for the dental work. Unfucking believable. I'm so frustrated. That is the Pain. The Bliss is the fact that I believe something good is in store for me. Goddess is strong in my heart One door closes and another opens. I just have to be smart enough to see it and choose correctly. Been studying all the herbs and stuff to understand the poisonous, medicinal, magical etc I got Cunninghams new Book of Shadows which has a section on herbs, it's great. I'm putting stuff in my book of shadows and using internet sources and other books so what I'm putting in MY book of Shadows is what I deem important not just blindly believing other sources. Especially for Magical use It's my intent it's what I impart on what I've written and what I want to use it for. If this does not make sense it's a wiccan thing and maybe too different.

The herb class I went to was run by Bunky who now putts REV in front of his name and spends his time teaching - He won the lottery several years ago $87 Milliondollars. I wasn't impressd with him before he was arrogent and said something rude to catt when we met him like 5 years ago but he has a stong opinion on everything I think he's always been like that I don't think it's the money I am sure that things in his life have changed but He dovoted himself to the craft. His class was a little too long. but there was breaks and I met several people and exchanged phone numbers. I'm trying to be more social,

Namaste JoDee

plaxo

A high school friend asked me to sign up for plaxo not sure exactly what it is but I figure that connecting with old friends is always a good idea. I received my masters of social work in 1996 after my children were grown and unfortunatley became disabled and have been fighting for government acknowledgement. I have a disorder known as Interstitial Cystitis *which is undergoing a name change that I don't agree with but am in the minority. I spent my whole life being to being told I was imagining my symptoms until my ovary burst one and suddenly I was told hey you really are sick sorry and yet still have have an uphill battle getting people to believe that yes this is an incurable disease in 1996 my best friend committed suicice after being diagnosed with this disease and still was told it was all in our heads. Only recently has it begun to be recognized as an actually disorder realted to auto immune disorders like fibromyable, lupus, asthma,etc.
Namast.
Jo

The Days are Long The Nights are Longer

ok I wrote this once and then deleted it and feel like a royal idiot. It's been a long Summer more at night They seemed to go so very slow. My gallbladder had to be removed in the beginning of August. I was shocked it took 2 hospitalizations for that to happen. Then last week I was back in hosp again. With the health care crisis I am blessed to have insurance but oh boy the copay each time $100 for the ER and $100 for each admit that doesn't begin to cover the radiologist who read the ex-rays etc etc. Then I broke a tooth and even with insurance it'll cost me almost $2000. Getting sleepy finally Namaste,
JoDee